This article is intended for informational and educational purposes related to personal identity and emotional well-being

Human identity is complex and can evolve over time. For many individuals, emotional and relational connections may shift throughout life in ways that don’t always align with commonly known labels. One identity that reflects this dynamic experience is abrosexuality—a term describing people whose sense of connection or interest toward others varies over time. Though not widely known, stories like that of Emma Flint, a writer from Staffordshire, England, are helping bring greater understanding to this identity.

What Is Abrosexuality?

According to Healthline, abrosexuality is a term used to describe individuals whose romantic or personal interests toward others may shift frequently. A person identifying as abrosexual might feel drawn to different people at different times, or go through periods of reduced or neutral emotional focus. Unlike other orientations that refer to specific types of attraction, abrosexuality emphasizes the changing nature of those experiences.

Source: Healthline – What It Means to Be Abrosexual

Emma Flint’s Personal Journey to Clarity

In an essay published by Metro UK in July 2024, Emma Flint shared her journey of coming to understand her identity. Over the years, Flint noticed that her patterns of connection and emotional focus shifted—sometimes feeling a strong emotional bond toward women, other times toward men, and at times, feeling emotionally neutral.

For years, she felt uncertain and invalidated. “I felt like a fraud,” Flint wrote, describing the confusion of trying to explain her changing experiences. Everything changed when she discovered the term “abrosexual” through an online community. For the first time, her journey had a name.

“Finally,” she wrote, “I felt seen.”

Source: Metro UK – Emma Flint’s Story

Clearing Up Misconceptions

Abrosexuality is often misunderstood due to its limited exposure in mainstream discourse. One of the most common misconceptions is that people with shifting orientations are simply “confused” or “unsure.” In reality, emotional and personal fluidity is recognized within academic and psychological research.

According to the American Psychological Association (APA), personal identity and relational focus can exist along a spectrum and may evolve throughout a person’s life. Such changes reflect the diversity of human experiences, not confusion.

Source: American Psychological Association – Sexual Orientation and Fluidity

Emma emphasized this: “It wasn’t that I couldn’t make my mind up, but that how I felt genuinely changed.” She shared that her connections are about the person, not defined strictly by gender: “I care about the individual, not their label.”

What Might Abrosexual Identity Look Like?

The way abrosexual identity is experienced varies greatly among individuals. Healthline outlines several patterns that may reflect this identity:

• Day-to-day variation: One day, a person might feel a strong emotional interest in one group, and the next day feel no particular focus at all.
• Gradual transitions: Emotional preferences may shift over weeks or months.
• Neutral phases: Individuals may go through periods of little or no interest in forming romantic connections.
• Changing self-identification: People may identify differently at different times based on how they experience their internal feelings and connections.

These patterns are all valid and reflect how some individuals naturally relate to others over time.

Source: Healthline – Abrosexuality Defined

Language as a Tool for Self-Understanding

For many individuals, including Emma Flint, discovering language that reflects their experience can be life-changing. Words offer validation, insight, and empowerment. As society becomes more inclusive and open to diverse identities, terms like abrosexuality help more people feel understood.

Visibility of such terms is especially helpful for younger people or those just beginning their self-discovery journey. With access to supportive language and resources from mental health organizations and community networks, individuals are better equipped to explore their identity with confidence.

Source: The Trevor Project – Understanding LGBTQ+ Identities

Navigating Social Assumptions

Despite growing awareness, people with fluid identities often encounter skepticism or misunderstanding. Flint recalled hearing comments like “just pick a side,” which reflects society’s discomfort with non-fixed identities.

Experts explain that these reactions often stem from binary thinking—the belief that people must fit into one static category. But as shown in the research of Dr. Lisa Diamond, professor of psychology and gender studies at the University of Utah, human identity, especially related to connection and preference, can be fluid and valid.

Source: Journal of Sex Research – Dr. Lisa Diamond’s Work

The Power of Representation

Emma Flint’s story highlights the impact of representation. By openly sharing her experience, she contributes to wider awareness and gives voice to others who may feel unseen.

“We’re always learning new things about ourselves,” she wrote. “Eventually, I hope that abrosexuality will be viewed simply as another valid way of experiencing life—not something that needs justification.”

Such stories help promote empathy, challenge stereotypes, and support a culture of inclusion.

Conclusion

Abrosexuality represents one of many valid ways people experience their personal identity and interpersonal connection. While not yet widely recognized, it is a meaningful orientation that deserves respect and understanding. Emma Flint’s experience underscores how essential it is to have the language, community, and self-awareness needed for growth.

As social discussions continue to evolve, embracing the full spectrum of human experience ensures that everyone has a space to feel seen, supported, and valued.